- "... in every case say yes to your wife then you will be happy otherwise you'll be in trouble........"
- "Insurance is like marriage. You pay, pay, pay, and you never get anything back."
- “The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.”
- Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, where the heck is the ceiling.
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